Nip, Nip, Hooray?

We have nipples. 
Most of us have two, and there are those of us who have three (or more).

Ivannah tell you your fortune

But what do we do with them? 

Feed our offspring? Gage the temperature?

As a possessor of nipples, I  admit to having found zero uses for them.
I suppose nipples serve as an aesthetic reminder of my femininity, right? 

Well no, men have nipples too. But why? 

All human babies are born with what may be referred to as a 'female template'. Testosterone is not produced for roughly six weeks after conception in most mammals, and this is when a genetically disposed male fetus would begin developing as such. 

There is a distinct biological function for women's nipples, we can agree on this. But genetically speaking, "why do men keep their nipples"? Or as week six winner, Brooks, suggests:

My inchoate response; yes. 

Yes, nipples on men is a waste. But like all burning Put It In My Mouth topics we must penetrate the surface. We must probe, we must take a deeper look.    (too many innuendos?) 

Genesis Erogenous E Pluribus Unum 

The erogenous potential for nipples (on both men and women) is something of a myth. Simply put, nipple sensation varies from person to person. 

Now, I have only ever been romantic with my current boyfriend* so I can not tell you tall tales of what men do or do not like. . . but. . . I do have friends who are huge sluts and who love to dish. 

You know how it goes? They get a mouthful, I get an earful. 

From my second hand research, and correct me if I'm wrong, men either enjoy some stimulation to their nipples or they do not. 

It is that simple.
You can ask a man candidly whether he likes it. . . or you can find out while you're in the field. Just don't be too attached to the outcome. 

Toys for Tits

Fun and games. Yes, between the ages of __ and __, tweaking a fellow's nipple(s) is considered an amusing pastime. 

Purple Nurple and Titty Twister are just a couple games you may remember. My girlfriends and I used to play a long running game of Titty-Tag. 

It is explanatory in name and I admit, it never got old**. 

Udder no circumstances; teets on tv

When appraising the worth of men's nipples, one must consider the value of a woman's nipples. 

For example, those of you who were not as (near black out) drunk as I was during Super Bowl XXXVIII may remember this:

Rock "her" body broadcast

The message to say no to prejudice, ignorance, bigotry, and illiteracy while Janet sang us out of Rhythm Nation became lost after Justin Timberlake danced onto stage and tugged at the lip of her nip creating the most memorable*** nipslip of all time. 

What did this broadcasted moment teach us about nipples? 

They are worth a lot:

How much? 

$ The development of YouTube by Jawed Karim $
$ 35,000 new Tivo subscribers $

$ The induction into the Guinness World Records as the "Most Searched in Internet History" and the "Most Searched for News Items" $

$ The Supreme Court eventually ruled in favor of CBS and Viacom but not before 

Viacom paid out 3.5 million in settlements $

This event also had a negative cost for Janet, Ms. Jackson if you're nasty. . . and MTV:

-$ MTV was told by the National Football League that they would never be involved in another halftime show. -$

-$ Janet Jackson was banned from attending the 2004 Grammy Awards and multiple radio stations were forbidden to air her music during some of the litigation process. -$

women's nipples = $$$$

men's nipples = eh? A waste?**** 

Friction non-fiction 

Men, do you ever run? Do your nipples ever chafe? Prohibited to go shirtless in a gym but don't want to wear those tight shirts that will protect your nipples? 

Are you asking yourself at that moment:

Well here is your chance to weigh in. Tell us in the comment field how you feel about men's nipples, especially if you strongly advocate for them. Put It In My Mouth encourages conflicting opinions. 

Be lascivious, be creative, be thoughtful. 

We are sure it will be titillating. 

*I love you!

**There are some double standards applied to titty twisting games. I recommend never grabbing, flicking, pinching, twisting, etc anyone's nipple unless you have been given express consent. 

***Well, memorable unless you were black out drunk.

****inconclusive 

https://t.co/zxZO6ZTrsu
— Valerie Jane (@Vajajane) July 16, 2013